Thoughts of the Month

Reflecting throughout this month of thoughts and actions, especially the last week since it was a big month for me with facing and resisting old temptations as well as discerning the spirits around me. I surrender my life to love and only seek to surround myself with it. Selfishness is hard to tolerate when you are trying to remain balanced within spirit. Sometimes when we are more aware of our surroundings we are able to discern the fruits of the enemy compared to the fruits of the Holy Spirit. When someone is not concerned about you or what you are going through and they are only thinking about themselves they are more then likely recovering from what ever they are personally dealing with. Some people think that what they are going through is more important then what you are. Notice by their actions and reactions to what you are going through, and unfortunately even know they think their struggle is worse it doesn't mean it is the reality. Everyone has their struggles in which they need to cope on their own. This feeling of superiority is an illusion to them and what some psychiatrists consider normal since they promote selfishness in recovery, this defeats the purpose doesn't it, since your addiction and personal issues are due to selfishness to begin with? The difference of someone living in the Holy Spirit compared to the enemy is their self pity and absorption of what they want from people or their feeling of entitlement. What makes one more of a victim then another? Attitude and dwelling in the past or worrying about things that are uncontrolled by us. We can't help anyone who doesn't want to be helped and we can't awaken someone who doesn't want to keep their eyes open. Just like we can pray all we want for someones wellness and unless they receive it they will not be well. Being self conscious and self aware of your own personal restrictions whether it be socially or professionally is necessary in order to drive passed them. However, there is a difference between being selfish because you can as a crutch through recovery or coping and being selfish out of focusing to become well. How can we tell if we are being so burdened by our own recovery that we continue hurting others around us? It is simple, if we want to change then we will change, if we are depressed because we need to change to get well then this is our selfish tendencies outweighing our path of recovery.

Just because it makes us feel better to hear doesn't necessarily mean we are accepting the truth. Be careful what you receive in your heart, lies are not a substitute for comfort they are merely a temporary solution to hurt and the perfect illusion to truth.~Me 7/21/14

It is funny how growing up and out of our irresponsible rebellion can change what temptations actually effect or encounter us. I used to go to concerts a lot more then I am able to now, mostly because I have a full time job and limited paid time off. Obviously when we are younger some of us, more then others, like to take the full scene in and get involved in things which others would not dream or think about. This was my problem, I had dreams and thoughts to try anything that came my way, and unfortunately I did, but fortunately I am at the point in my life that I can look beyond the surface of the experience and not seek after what makes its way to me. There are way more important things then wasting money on a needless experiment with mind and body. Nothing is worth temporary effects to feel good when the consequences could be irreversible and result in loss of life. Substance abuse and addiction is no joke, it is a real disease and many go through it while younger and some will continue their whole lives chasing after a feeling. Self-help is the first step to recovery. What a difference time and faith has done to change my life around for the better and more responsible in the matters of facing temptation and resisting negative urges. It feels good to care about myself and body, as well as accept my life as a whole knowing that although it may not have been the will of God that I faltered, it was the will of God that I returned to my first love, him. After this week and the experience I had, I feel closer again to him, may I continue to walk in his will and I pray that my eyes remain open to see the enemy coming so I can discern the right choices.

May we remember, on the road to recovery forgiveness of the past is important to move passed who you were so you can become what you are meant to be. Whether it be forgiveness of self or others we need to accept their is nothing we can do to change what was or what will be, but we can focus on changing ourselves right now. If we start focusing on how we feel and facing what caused that feeling then we can move on from the hurt it causes. Putting off facing it or numbing the pain is only temporary, yank the band-aid and let the air heal it.  Time to face it and wake up from living a life in lack of concern of self and others.

In forgiveness there should be no partiality. If you are going to forgive then do it with your whole heart. Otherwise, you keep yourself open to that lingering bitterness which restricts you from receiving the grace that comes from forgiveness.~Me 7/10

If you're dealing with addiction, or substance abuse, know that although it's a life long journey it's not impossible. If you know that it won't do anything positive for your life then you will be able to start making decisions which lead to sobriety. I pray that you receive the peace along the path of wellness, always. 

Death by Right, Love by Choice.